*** WATCH *** BURLY DOOR-DASHER BATTLES COPS AFTER NOT RECEIVING...

“Hate is a lack of imagination.”

~ Graham Greene, The Power and the Glory

HYANNIS, MASSACHUSETTS – [HN VIDEO NOTES & MULLINGS ON THE MATTER] – Although a local DoorDash driver clearly told police officers he did not want to be arrested, it did absolutely nothing to change their minds on the subject, as it appeared to be no longer open for debate.

As you will see and hear in the following HN Video, at around 12:30 a.m. Saturday morning, Barnstable Police patrol officers were dispatched to the Kentucky Fried Chicken drive-thru on Barnstable Road, for a report of man refusing to leave. According to sources, the man allegedly refusing to leave was a DoorDash driver who reportedly had the incorrect impression that the KFC drive-thru should have still been open, until at least 1:00 a.m. He was reportedly attempting to complete one of his deliveries, but the restaurant was already closed, sources say. The DoorDash driver then allegedly began yelling and banging on the drive-thru window, refusing to leave, according to sources. It was then when KFC workers called the cops…

(Note 1: As of yet, HN has not heard the DoorDash driver’s side of the story and will gladly update this report should it ever become available…)

(Note 2: This bizarre and desperate skirmish could have all been avoided but for the fact our tone-deaf Town of Barnstable town councilors continue to allow the archaic, commerce killing practice of forcing all legitimate, after hours businesses to completely close down before 1:00 a.m., thus creating an after-hours food and service desert, along with creating other forms of inconvenience (think pharmacies for sick people in the middle of the night) and desperation for those lawfully employed citizens partaking in our otherwise normal 24/7, 2024 real-life economy. We need to do away with these archaic, town imposed, debilitating business curfews, and instead focus on a functional, safe 24/7 year-round economy. We need to be open for growth and around-the-clock legal commerce, for the benefit of all contributing members of the community… not just for those fortunate enough to be working “banker’s hours…” … like those convenient hours enjoyed by all those now sitting over in Town Hall. In short, not everyone is fortunate enough to have “banker’s hours…”)

When HN arrived on scene, officers were attempting to place the driver under arrest. And as you’ll see and hear, all hell followed from that point onward…

While the enraged door-dasher was doing his utmost to stop officers from stuffing him into a Barnstable Police cruiser, another fellow door-dasher, who also happened to be at the Barnstable Road KFC at that particular time, kindly helped the arrested man by finding his missing sneaker.

At this time, the door-dasher who continued to protest that he didn’t want to be arrested, began shouting while actively resisting officers and, in a demonstration of incredible fury and strength, began pushing himself above the police vehicle’s roofline.

“I just wanted to do my [expletive] door-dash job! I just wanted to do my door-dash job!” he exclaimed.

It was at that point; the other fellow door-dasher recognized his brother’s profound grief in not being able to complete his timely meal delivery. And upon realizing he had zero chance of helping his disappointed door-dash compadre out of his police-issued handcuffs, he did the only other thing he could do, which was to at least help the bereft meal deliverer find his missing sneaker. (It’s a well-known and often quoted DoorDash rule and code of conduct: That one must “Never leave a brother food deliverer without his shoe!”)

Profound words to live by…

Upon seeing his recovered sneaker, the DoorDash man began to excitedly acknowledge his loyal brother in the cause of fast-food delivery, “My man, thank you! This is my [expletive] man! … What’s your name, brother?”

The other DoorDash man answered “Jay.”

The arrested food deliverer then briefly had cause to celebrate, yelling out, “JAY, YEAH!”

And turning toward the police officers in his momentary glory, he continued to yell out, “He’s a fellow DoorDash man!” But it was at that precise moment when officers suddenly rallied, teaming up to stuff the angry DoorDash man’s head and healthy midsection into the back of the police truck.

But as the police officers’ sudden cramming and stuffing was unfolding, the enraged food deliverer began growling like a defiant wolverine! And alas his angry, guttural snarls were ultimately fruitless and to no avail. The angry DoorDash man had finally been, as they say, “cuffed and stuffed…”

Thankfully, and to everyone’s great relief, the enraged man did not get tasered… and, for that matter, nobody appears to have been gravely wounded during the drawn-out drive-thru fracas.

At the very least – and as I would venture to guess – the entire thing turned out to be a bit of a disappointing, momentary blow for the entire local, 24/7 DoorDash community. Jay had already left, so I was unable to gather his sincere thoughts on the matter. (Also, all restaurants had already been forced to close their doors, because of the tone-deaf, commerce killing nine-to-fivers over in Barnstable town hall. No more door-dashing or any other form of legal employment for those finding themselves confined inside the Town of Barnstable city limits…) I do, however, remember saying to Jay that once a police officer says you are “under arrest,” you have absolutely no legal standing to resist at that point… and that it usually makes matters much worse… and that it’s best to let the courts handle the matter from that point forward.

It was messy business… and the following HN Video carefully documents the unfortunate affair…

… and it goes without saying, no further details were available at the time of this report. In fact, what could anyone really say? While the following HN Video does a reasonably good job at capturing the entire spirit of the following Hytown drama (it was “good” documentation, and in real time, no less…)

… I wouldn’t go as far as saying it was “finger licking good.” 😉

* The initial details contained in the above report are based on police radio transmissions and information from sources on scene. All potential defendants are presumed to be innocent unless and until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt in a court of law.

[HN VIDEO – PRESS PLAY]